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02-Feb-2016 17:42

His students have converged in a downtown Toronto hotel from across the province, each dishing out a cool ,000 for a three-day seminar with the California-based Love Systems guru, because things haven’t gone well for them in the bars, grocery stores and coffee shops where they have attempted meeting women who transfix. It’s about communicating your own inner strength and character.”More nods. Meanwhile, I’m pondering the more existential questions about why 20-something men who hang out on university campuses and night clubs are digging into their wallets for ,000 to get help meeting women.“I just needed to get this part of my life handled,” explained one. The more energized and playful alternatives include: “Let me guess. You are getting drunk, your friend is flirting with boys and your other friend is keeping you both out of trouble.”Or, if making the high-difficulty approach to a group of women, consider this, Shepherd advises: “Which one of you is the leader?

Shepherd, a 34-year-old Montrealer who travels the world — Sydney, London, Berlin, Tokyo, New York — teaching the mysteries of the female mind, is equipping his students with pre-prepared questions designed to fill the crucial seconds that follow, “Hey there, I’m Joe.”Begin, he suggests, with observational intuitiveness. “If you could have dinner with anyone in the world, who would it be? “It’s better than spending it buying drinks all night for women who disappear.”Another said: “I’ve saved up for months to do this. So I prioritized it.”In part, Shepherd says, they need help because they’re too honest off the bat. To complete the object lesson, the men break into pairs for play acting exercises with each other — an odd series of man-on-fake-woman exchanges. ” If they all claim the title, which he says is likely, initiate a round of rock-paper-scissors to determine the winner.

“You have a smart girl vibe,” he says, looking at one of his students in a kind of gender twisted role-play. ”Whether such an approach actually works as advertised (unthinkable if it were uttered by me), here’s what’s clear: Shepherd delivers it with charm. “In early encounters, I open up about the highlights of my life,” he tells them. Observational point: men who self-admittedly have little understanding of female reaction may not be the most reliable role-play partners when it comes to female reactions. If you stutter step, it shows hesitation.” The other conversation killer here, Shepherd injects, is the old chestnut question about how your night is going. The secret ingredient: “You’re leading this,” he says. Two instructors dig into their pickup artist grab bag and pull out the so-called “opinion opener” method: Seemingly random and spontaneous questions signifying nothing but nevertheless bridging a conversation in crisis.

“You have to be thinking that you’re worthy of her, that you have something to offer her. ,” the student’s voice tailing upward into a question rather than a statement of conviction.

Women like this stuff more than guys do.”Nine out of the 10 women I surveyed about the methodology of pickup artistry tell a far different story (it may have actually been all 10). “Preaching that men should adopt an inauthentic, overly confident personality while making a first impression likely sets his clients up for future trouble down the line,” she says.

”Another coach steps in and places his hand on Phil’s arm, squeezing gently. I bet you do a nurturing job like dolphin veterinarian.”Doug, inspired, tries again. “How long do you have to wait after you break up with someone before you hook up with her roommate?

He parrots the dolphin veterinarian line to his male partner. ” The answer is, of course, as irrelevant as the question.

Otherwise, you’re giving off the needy vibe.”The resulting nods around the table serve as an outward expression of self-reflection. Ask questions that get down to her character and the reasons why she’s doing things (while) communicating your own character.”Next, he says, be prepared for the return volley of questions. And so begins an aimless verbal meander through nothingness, eventually leading to involuntary cringes around the room.

“You have to be thinking that you’re worthy of her, that you have something to offer her. ,” the student’s voice tailing upward into a question rather than a statement of conviction.

Women like this stuff more than guys do.”Nine out of the 10 women I surveyed about the methodology of pickup artistry tell a far different story (it may have actually been all 10). “Preaching that men should adopt an inauthentic, overly confident personality while making a first impression likely sets his clients up for future trouble down the line,” she says.

”Another coach steps in and places his hand on Phil’s arm, squeezing gently. I bet you do a nurturing job like dolphin veterinarian.”Doug, inspired, tries again. “How long do you have to wait after you break up with someone before you hook up with her roommate?

He parrots the dolphin veterinarian line to his male partner. ” The answer is, of course, as irrelevant as the question.

Otherwise, you’re giving off the needy vibe.”The resulting nods around the table serve as an outward expression of self-reflection. Ask questions that get down to her character and the reasons why she’s doing things (while) communicating your own character.”Next, he says, be prepared for the return volley of questions. And so begins an aimless verbal meander through nothingness, eventually leading to involuntary cringes around the room.

Shepherd, a real-life Hitch and international dating coach who has built a career servicing male ineptitude in the pursuit of women, holds a kind of celebrity here. Mike, a 21-year-old university student from London, Ont., offers up basketball icon Michael Jordan as his hypothetical dream dinner mate when asked by Shepherd. “The point is to talk about yourself and say that Michael Jordan is an inspiration that has meant a lot in my life in terms of becoming successful in my own life.